{"id":703,"date":"2011-09-02T21:47:28","date_gmt":"2011-09-02T21:47:28","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.fanagrams.net\/blog\/?p=703"},"modified":"2011-09-02T21:47:28","modified_gmt":"2011-09-02T21:47:28","slug":"pathologic-memories","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.fanagrams.com\/blog\/2011\/09\/pathologic-memories\/","title":{"rendered":"Pathologic Memories"},"content":{"rendered":"

As an anatomic pathologist, I am frequently in a dilemma when asked what kind of work I do.\u00a0 For non-physicians the answer almost invariably requires further explanation.<\/span>\u00a0 Sometimes I include the explanation all in one breath, \u201cI\u2019m a pathologist.<\/span>\u00a0 We do autopsies and analyze anything that is removed at surgery, like an appendix or a lung.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0 Most people outside the medical world have some vague idea of what a pathologist does, but this idea generally conjures up grisly images.<\/span>\u00a0 For many, pathology is equivalent to blood and guts, and a pathologist is some sort of social misfit working in some dank and poorly lit basement.<\/span>\u00a0 \u201cOOO \u2013 doesn\u2019t that have something to do with embalming?\u201d asked one visibly nervous secretary.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

During my residency, I had collected various specimens from autopsies that showed the evils of smoking and drinking, including lungs and livers riddled with cancer or hearts showing the effects of hypertension or atherosclerosis.\u00a0 They were all stored in a large bucket of formaldehyde that I would take to schools for a very vivid demonstration of the consequences of poor life choices.<\/span>\u00a0 At one school, a student raised her hand and earnestly asked, \u201cIs someone making you do this job?\u201d<\/span>\u00a0 One day my friend Rudd peered into my trunk and said \u201cwhat\u2019s in that big bucket?\u201d<\/span>\u00a0 She was so intrigued that we immediately had an \u201corgan recital\u201d on her driveway, but her equanimity was unusual.<\/span>\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Pathologists also don\u2019t get much respect among the physician community.\u00a0 The image is typically of the socially inept or English-as-a-second-language misfit who can\u2019t hack it on the front lines of medicine.<\/span>\u00a0 It is perhaps not surprising that pathology departments are often located in the basement of the hospital.<\/span>\u00a0 There is a long standing joke stereotyping the different medical specialties, \u201c<\/span>Internists know everything and do nothing, <\/span>s<\/strong>urgeons know nothing and do everything, psychiatrists know nothing and do nothing and pathologists may know everything, but they are always a day late.\u201d \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

While television and the movies have generally portrayed physicians as over-sexed and overworked surgeons, pathologists have been largely ignored, with a few notable exceptions.\u00a0 In a 1972 movie, the \u201cCarey Treatment,\u201d James Coburn plays the title role \u2013 a pathologist, of all things, who\"\"<\/a> sets out to investigate the botched abortion and subsequent death of a colleague\u2019s daughter and predictably becomes embroiled in the violent world of a drug cartel.<\/span>\u00a0 Dr. Carey embodies all the traits usually reserved for surgeons.<\/span>\u00a0 He is handsome, assumes that M.D. stands for \u201cmajor deity\u201d and surrounds himself with beautiful women.<\/span>\u00a0 He even mouths off to a surgeon over the OR intercom, \u201cDo you want the diagnosis now or do you want it right?\u201d<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

The high point of the movie is when Dr. Carey, hospitalized for stab wounds, tussles with a would-be assassin.<\/span>\u00a0 When Carey gets the upper hand, the drug-crazed killer offers him a deal and begins to pray.<\/span>\u00a0 Dr. Carey then says the immortal words that have stereotyped surgeons for decades, \u201cThere is no God in this room, I make all the decisions.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0 The writers of this movie must have thought that it was necessary to explain why a lowly pathologist had acquired the persona of a surgeon.<\/span>\u00a0 Early in the movie Carey confesses to one of his girlfriends that all he ever wanted to be when he grew up was a surgeon, but that \u201cit didn\u2019t work out.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0 While the movie does manage to make a pathologist look like something better than a feeble misfit, one also gets the impression that such a career should not be anyone\u2019s first choice.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

While casting Carey as a pathologist seemed like a curious choice, it began to make more sense when I realized that as a pathologist Carey can be both a physician and a detective, blending two of the basic staples of TV.\u00a0 The TV show <\/span>Quincy picked up on this theme.<\/span>\u00a0 Quincy was a \"\"<\/a>crusading pathologist who risked his life to investigate crimes.<\/span>\u00a0 When we first met, my future husband decided to watch a \u201c<\/span>Quincy\u201d episode to learn about what I was doing all day.<\/span>\u00a0 He was aghast to learn that pathologists routinely got shot at in the course of their work.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>In 1982 I looked forward to the premier of \u201cSt. Elsewhere\u201d which was billed as a real life look at residents in a decaying urban hospital.<\/span>\u00a0 However, from the first episode, it became clear that the writers had pegged the pathology department as the source of black humor.<\/span>\u00a0 Dr. Kathy Martin is a totally spacey pathologist and incidentally a nymphomaniac.<\/span>\u00a0 She seduces her living conquests on the mortuary tables and later gets\"\"<\/a> raped there.<\/span>\u00a0 Another particularly grisly story line featured a pathologist selling body parts, specifically severed heads.<\/span>\u00a0 \u201cSt Elsewhere\u201d didn\u2019t do pathologists any favors by portraying this specialty as a type of punitive purgatory for wayward internists.<\/span>\u00a0 When Dr. Peter White is accused of Dr. Martin\u2019s rape, all other medical privileges are stripped and he is sent (to the basement of course) to dabble harmlessly in pathology until the charges are investigated.<\/span>\u00a0 While he cannot treat patients, apparently he can practice pathology without any particular training.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

CSI:Crime Scene Investigation is a current family of TV shows that builds on the basic Quincy formula, with a lot of extra sex and technology thrown in.<\/span>\u00a0 Instead of the aging <\/span>Quincy, the detectives are either hunky men or women with exceptionally tight low cut shirts.<\/span>\u00a0 In <\/span>Quincy, the opening credits featured the grizzly pathologist in front of a line of policemen.<\/span>\u00a0 Quincy says, \u201cWelcome to the wonderful world of pathology.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0 As he rips the shroud off one corpse, all the policemen faint like a row of falling dominoes.<\/span>\u00a0 CSI certainly includes plenty of blood and guts, but manages to glamorize the whole mess with exquisite slow motion simulations of bullets splintering skulls and shredded arteries spurting blood.<\/span>\u00a0 The set is filled with all sorts of prop machines with blinking lights while the cast meticulously recreates crime scenes in artfully underlit sets of dark blue light.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Now I have worked in the city morgue, and I can tell you it was nothing like CSI.\u00a0 Every morning we would file into the over air-conditioned morgue that was so brightly lit you wanted to put on a jacket and sun glasses.<\/span>\u00a0 Corpses gathered from the previous day were arrayed on stainless steel autopsy tables. <\/span>\u00a0You were supposed to eye all the bodies and then go stand next to the one that you wanted to work on.<\/span>\u00a0 It was like picking out a blind date, only a whole lot creepier.<\/span>\u00a0 There was occasionally a murder case, which was a lot more work than the \u201cDIBs\u201d patients (i.e. dead in bed).<\/span>\u00a0 It was assumed that these poor souls had died of natural causes and thus warranted no more than a cursory autopsy.<\/span>\u00a0 Occasionally the chief coroner would sweep into the room like a minor deity, particularly if there was some case that might require a press conference.<\/span>\u00a0 Dr. Stein had become a faddish celebrity in <\/span>Chicago when corpses of dozens of victims were unearthed under the basement of John Wayne Gacy, who held the top spot of serial killer for several years.<\/span>\u00a0 Dr. Stein also was in the news during a prolonged heat wave in <\/span>Chicago that killed many elderly people.<\/span>\u00a0 I remember his complaint was not so much that the people had died, but that he was running out of storage room in the morgue.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Certainly forensic pathology has advanced in the past 25 years with fluids and fibers taking center stage, but even discounting the march of technology, it didn\u2019t look like Dr. Stein contributed anything to the examination, and certainly the pathologists in the morgue were no crusading crime fighters like Quincy or the CSI cast.\u00a0 I remember one beautiful spring day we all felt like a road trip, and someone suggested that we visit a crime scene and try to find a bullet.<\/span>\u00a0 Four of us hopped into someone\u2019s convertible and arrived at what looked like a peaceful leafy neighborhood.<\/span>\u00a0 We walked around to the back to inspect a porch where the crime had supposedly been committed.<\/span>\u00a0 A bunch of neighborhood residents were hanging out on the porch, some were smoking dope.<\/span>\u00a0 When we explained who we were, the residents visibly relaxed, and one said out loud to the group, \u201cDon\u2019t worry, its not vice, it\u2019s just homicide.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0\u00a0 We chatted with the folks for a while, made a token look for an embedded bullet, and then called it a day, headed back to the office, and wrote up a report saying that despite a diligent search, no bullet was found.<\/span>\u00a0 No estimating angles, laser beams tracing a bullet\u2019s path, and no discussion of whether or not the weapon was a Glock with a right twist.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

So what do I care if the TV shows are unrealistic?\u00a0 With three different versions of CSI on the air, all in endless reruns on cable TV, I should embrace the newfound glamour and respect for pathologists.<\/span>\u00a0 When someone asks what I do, I will now say with pride and conviction, \u201cI am a pathologist, like CSI on TV.<\/span>\u00a0 We solve crimes and make the world a safer place.\u201d <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

The missing words in the following poem are anagrams (i.e. share the same letters, like spot, stop and post) and the asterisks indicate the number of letters.\u00a0 One of the missing words will rhyme with either the previous or following line.\u00a0 Your job is to solve the missing words based on the above rules and the context of the poem.\u00a0 Scroll down for answers.<\/span><\/em><\/h6>\n

As the autopsy starts, the pathologist reaches for her —— knife,<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Slices open the body and searches for why this soul lost his life.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>She inspects lungs and bowels that still glisten and quiver,<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>And samples each organ by cutting out a representative ——.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>It turns out that human —— look just like what you buy at the store,<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>That\u2019s why she has no longer eats organ meats for dinner any more.<\/span><\/p>\n

*<\/span><\/p>\n

*<\/span><\/p>\n

*<\/span><\/p>\n

*<\/span><\/p>\n

*<\/span><\/p>\n

*<\/span><\/p>\n

*<\/span><\/p>\n

Answers:\u00a0 silver, sliver, livers<\/span><\/span><\/p>\nFollow Liza Blue on: \"Facebook\"<\/a>\"twitter\"<\/a>Share: \"Facebook\"<\/a>\"twitter\"<\/a>\"reddit\"<\/a>\"pinterest\"<\/a>\"linkedin\"<\/a>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

As an anatomic pathologist, I am frequently in a dilemma when asked what kind of work I do.\u00a0 For non-physicians the answer almost invariably requires further explanation.\u00a0 Sometimes I include the explanation all in one breath, \u201cI\u2019m a pathologist.\u00a0 We … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-703","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-what-i-did"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7iVc8-bl","post_mailing_queue_ids":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.fanagrams.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/703","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.fanagrams.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.fanagrams.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.fanagrams.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.fanagrams.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=703"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.fanagrams.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/703\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":708,"href":"https:\/\/www.fanagrams.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/703\/revisions\/708"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.fanagrams.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=703"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.fanagrams.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=703"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.fanagrams.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=703"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}